Wife addicted to gaming neglects 4-year-old, threatens to kill in-laws — 'Can I get a divorce?'

A man has shared his story of a wife who neglected their child while consumed by video games, threatened to kill his parents and then walked out of the family home — never returning in over a year.

The story of A, a man in his 30s with a 4-year-old daughter, was featured Monday on YTN Radio's legal advice program hosted by attorney Jo In-seop.

A's wife spent every night absorbed in computer games until dawn. Her sleep schedule became completely reversed — she would only fall asleep in the morning when their daughter woke up, leaving the home in a state of neglect.

A works night shifts as a delivery driver. He said that when he asked his wife to look after their child before leaving for work, she responded only with verbal abuse. Even after he arrived at work, she called to threaten that she would "go find your parents and stab them to death."

A rushed home and tried to remove a kitchen knife from the kitchen, at which point his wife called police, screaming that her husband was trying to kill her. The couple was questioned by police through the night, and A was cleared of any charges.

His wife walked out of the police station and left the family home on the spot, and has been unreachable for more than a year since.

Now raising his daughter alone, A said his wife has not been in contact — apparently not even curious about the child. "I was deeply hurt by the false report and the verbal abuse," he said. "I want to know whether I can file for divorce and whether I can be designated as the child's custodian."

Attorney Lim Gyeong-mi said that if the wife had abandoned the family home for an extended period without caring for the family, it would constitute "malicious desertion," a legally recognized ground for a contested divorce. She added that neglecting housework and child-rearing due to excessive gaming, combined with the death threat against A's parents, would also qualify as "other serious grounds making it difficult to continue the marriage," making a divorce filing possible.

Lim said that since the wife bears primary responsibility for the breakdown of the marriage, A could also seek consolation damages for emotional distress. She noted that the death threat and the false police report were decisive causes of the marital breakdown, and that if the wife's culpability is established in court, damages would likely be awarded.

On the question of custody, Lim said courts place the child's welfare above all else, and that if A has been providing stable care and has a supportive caregiving environment in place, he stands a strong chance of being designated both legal guardian and primary custodian.

Lim also said A could seek reimbursement for child-support costs incurred from the time his wife left to the present, and that future child support — payable until the child reaches adulthood — could be calculated and claimed based on the wife's income and assets after the divorce.

She added that the wife's threat to harm A's parents could constitute criminal intimidation, and that because the threat targeted a lineal ascendant, it would carry heavier punishment than ordinary intimidation. The false police report, she said, could also be prosecuted as filing a false accusation or making a false report.