Woman outed for affair in 500-member office chat dies; family's damages suit largely rejected

A woman died after her partner exposed her affair in a workplace group chat with more than 500 members. Her family filed a civil lawsuit holding him responsible for her death, but the court ruled there was no causal link. It reasoned that taking one's own life over defamation cannot be considered an ordinary human response.

According to legal circles Wednesday, A's family had filed a lawsuit against B seeking 100 million won ($74,500) in damages. Judge Choi Bok-gyu of Suwon District Court's Anyang branch, Civil Division 3, ruled Aug. 13 that B must pay 19 million won in emotional distress damages caused by his defamation. The ruling rejected the bulk of the family's claim.

According to facts established by the court, A and B had dated, broken up, and then gotten back together around February 2023. That same month, while sleeping over at A's home, B secretly unlocked her phone and looked through it. He discovered through a messaging app that A had been having an affair with a coworker.

B took dozens of screenshots of A's messages and shared them in three group chats made up of A's coworkers, which had a combined membership of about 500 people. That day was the day after the wedding of the coworker with whom A had the affair.

A filed a criminal complaint against B. Three days after B leaked the messages, A died by suicide.

The case sent B to a criminal trial, and he was ultimately convicted on charges including defamation.

The first trial sentenced B to six months in prison, suspended for two years, but the appellate court increased the sentence to 10 months in prison, suspended for two years. That appellate ruling became final as is in September 2024.

The criminal court said B's actions appeared to have caused the victim severe psychological shock and led to the grave outcome of her death. It added that the nature of the offense was very serious, given that B exposed the victim's private life to hundreds of coworkers. It also said his actions after the fact prevented the victim from taking appropriate measures, worsening the harm.

The victim's family also filed a civil lawsuit against B seeking around 100 million won in damages. However, the court found it difficult to recognize a substantial causal link between B's wrongdoing and the victim's decision to take her own life.

The court explained that taking one's own life is typically a last resort taken when a person falls into despair. Such despair arises from believing their future life to be meaningless or that only misfortune and suffering await them. It said that, based on common experience, ending one's life over defamation or similar wrongdoing cannot be seen as an ordinary response for a victim.

The court added that the deceased had no prior history of receiving psychiatric treatment for depression or similar conditions. Considering this, it found insufficient grounds to conclude that B foresaw or could have foreseen the possibility of her taking her own life.

In addition, the court found that while the victim likely suffered psychological shock from B's wrongdoing, it was difficult to conclude that the extent of that shock was severe. It noted that in her final note, the victim wrote about feelings of guilt and apologies to those around her. She also included a message to B, telling him not to feel guilty and to go on living.

However, the court said that even if B does not bear direct responsibility for the victim's death, it found he inflicted psychological suffering on both the deceased and her family. It ordered him to pay damages for that harm.

The court set the amount owed to the family at 19 million won. It explained that it considered the motive and circumstances behind the wrongdoing, its content, and the extent of psychological suffering the victim likely endured.

The ruling has not yet been finalized. The family filed an appeal on Aug. 28, and a second trial is set to be held.

If you're thinking about self-harm or suicide, dial the Suicide Prevention Hotline at 109, available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Please request a translator for English-language services.