'What happens to my assets if I divorce again?' — Why divorced men hesitate to remarry

Divorced singles who hope to remarry share one thing in common: hesitation. But the reasons men and women hold back differ sharply, a new survey shows. Men cite fear of asset division, while women point to the freedom they have found since their divorce.

According to a survey of 648 divorced singles — 324 men and 324 women — conducted by remarriage matchmaking agencies Only-U and Bienarae, 31.5 percent of male respondents named "fear of asset division" as the main factor that makes them waver about remarrying, even when they want to.

That was followed by "the possibility of being screened out during a partner's asset verification process" at 25.0 percent, "various child-related variables" — including a child's opposition to the remarriage, blending children from both sides, child support and inheritance issues — at 22.2 percent, and "fear of another failed marriage" at 14.2 percent.

Women responded very differently. Some 43.2 percent of female respondents chose "a sense of liberation I am not willing to give up" as their top reason for hesitating. That was followed by "child-related variables" at 23.2 percent, "fear of another failure" at 18.1 percent, and "being screened out during asset verification" at 10.2 percent.

The gap between the sexes was stark. "Fear of asset division" — the top concern among men — was chosen by only 5.3 percent of women, while "sense of liberation" — the overwhelming choice among women — was selected by just 7.1 percent of men.

The two groups also diverged on what alternatives might ease the burden of remarriage. Men most preferred "mutual financial independence" at 36.1 percent, followed by "maintaining a partnership without legal marriage" at 28.1 percent. Women prioritized "maintaining a partnership" at 33.3 percent and "verification focused on core conditions" at 28.1 percent.

Differences also emerged in what each group looks for when meeting a potential remarriage partner. Men placed the most importance on "everyday lifestyle habits" — reflecting household financial management and spending tendencies — at 31.5 percent. Women, by contrast, ranked "the presence of serious flaws" such as infidelity, violence, gambling and financial irresponsibility as their top criterion, at 34.3 percent.

An Only-U official said men who bear primary responsibility for household finances naturally place great weight on a partner's financial mindset and attitude toward daily life. "Women, having been hurt by conflicts in a previous marriage, have no choice but to scrutinize a partner closely for signs of infidelity, verbal or physical abuse, gambling and financial incompetence," the official added.

Meanwhile, according to the Ministry of Statistics, the total number of remarriages in South Korea stood at 42,663 in 1990, accounting for 10.7 percent of all marriages. The figure climbed steadily, reaching 79,942 — or 25.4 percent — in 2005, before declining. From 2020 onward, the annual count fell back into the 40,000 range, and last year it hit a record low of 40,694, representing 16.9 percent of all marriages.

At the same time, the average age at remarriage has continued to rise. Last year, men remarried at an average age of 51.9 and women at 47.5 — up 4.3 years and 4.0 years, respectively, from a decade earlier, and up 7.8 years and 7.9 years compared with 20 years ago.

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